Wardrobe woes are a part of life on Earth, which by the transitive property means they can occasionally befall Major League Soccer players and clubs.
To jog your memories of these unusual MLS scenes, we've come up with a rundown of some of the malfunctions, mishaps and missteps that have occurred through the years. Most, but not all, came at some cost.
Real Salt Lake, 2007
Put this one in the mishap file. Head coach Jason Kreis wanted to give a nod to Real Madrid by having his Real Salt Lake boys wear white socks with FC Dallas in town one summer day. Unfortunately, nobody informed the game officials of the uniform change, which is a no-no.
The oversight cost the club a $10,000 fine after they lost the game 1-0 at the death. Insult meet injury.
Columbus, 2010
Robert Warzycha's Crew side might have pulled off a rare Concacaf Champions League upset in Mexico were it not for a uniform snafu. It all started about 20 minutes into a group match at Santos Laguna, when Columbus forward Emilio Renteria was bloodied by an elbow to the noggin.
He went off the field to get patched up by the Columbus medical staff and grab a fresh jersey. Shortly after returning to the field, Renteria's perfect cross was stabbed home by an Andy Iro header to seemingly put the visitors into a shock lead. There was a small problem, though.
Renteria picked up a shirt with no number on the back, which is why the referee never actually waved him back on the field. Iro's opener was wiped off the board, and Los Guerreros eventually bagged the winner with seconds remaining in stoppage time. Columbus would advance to the knockouts in the end, but the defeat did cost them first place in the group.
Eric Hassli, 2011
Several MLS players have drawn a second yellow card for shedding their jersey during a goal celebration. This ignominious brand of ejection has befallen the likes of Matias Perez Garcia and Cristian Techera, but the most spectacular example was authored by Vancouver's original Designated Player.
The Frenchman cheekily bagged the 1-1 equalizer from the spot, and then threw his shirt to the elated Empire Field crowd after yanking it off to reveal ... an identical uniform shirt. Hassli may have figured the twist to be a clever workaround of the rule that bans shirt removal during a celebration. The referee didn’t agree, and so the game's hero received his second booking of the second half and an early exit.
Vancouver, 2011
A couple months later, Hassli and the Whitecaps found themselves in another shirt pickle. It's unclear how it happened, but the club found themselves a handful of game jerseys short near first kick in San Jose.
Hassli, Jeb Brovsky, Joe Cannon, Davide Chiumiento and Mustapha Jarju were each missing half their uniform, so the club actually borrowed their respective jerseys from fans attending the game so they could play. They couldn't find anyone sporting Cannon's name and number, so a staffer reputedly drew the Bell sponsor logo on a plain goalkeeper shirt they had around.
That fast thinking meant that the Whitecaps escaped their equipment crisis without any punishment, and they managed to leave Buck Shaw with a 2-2 draw thanks to Hassli's brace.
San Jose, 2013
No team wants to be shorthanded when protecting a 1-0 lead, especially due to a wardrobe malfunction. It's much more aggravating when left with nine men because two players crossed the sideline to simultaneously remedy boot woes. The Earthquakes learned this the hard way when Vancouver visited in 2013.
Chris Wondolowski put the home side up on 18 minutes, and things were going well until the edge of the hour mark. With Sam Cronin down and looking for help from the San Jose trainer, Victor Bernardez and Alan Gordon both went to switch out cleats that had proven to be too slippery for the conditions.
However, ref Fotis Bazakos didn’t allow the physio onto the field and instead asked the San Jose duo to perform their shoe maintenance off the field. Bernardez and Gordon each got their new footwear, but had to watch from the sideline as Corey Hertzog deposited the 1-1 leveler with his first, last and only MLS goal.
"I take full responsibility for that," said Gordon after the match. "I feel like I let the team down, left them without two guys. They took advantage of it and we got punished."
Chivas USA, 2014
Just a couple weeks after San Jose’s cleat nightmare, Chivas USA suffered a similar version of rough luck. This time, Carlos Bocanegra required a cleat change only five minutes into their game in Portland.
With the veteran defender off to the side, Will Johnson fired home the early opener. The Goats clawed back for a 1-1 draw on Erick Torres' late strike, but it might have been a winner if Bocanegra had better luck with his cleats coming out of the dressing room.
Chivas USA, 2014
Yep, the final Rojiblancos season was anything but a picnic. This time, a lack of studs proved woeful during a late-July match at Colorado. Despite the soggy weather conditions, stand-in central defenders Andrew Jean-Baptiste and Eriq Zavaleta came out in boots much better suited for a dryer day.
As one might guess, they were slipping and sliding all over the turf. It caused problems, and before they switched into wet-weather spiked boots, the Rapids capitalized for two goals.
"The first thing you do in these types of games is be well prepared with the right tools, and some players went on the field with cleats that aren't good for this weather and these conditions," Chivas USA boss Wilmer Cabrera complained after the 3-0 loss was complete. "They were slipping over there and it cost us."
